Loro mi dicevano

Ritò mi ha provocato, e ora si becca questo:

Chi è Ritò? Chi è Ritò?

CHI E’ RITO’???

Ritò è quell’amica mia bella, ma così bella, ma tanto bella che dice gli ha fatto causa alla Disney e l’ha vinta, e ora due noti cartoons han dovuto cambiare titolo rispettivamente in “La niente-di-che addormentata nel bosco” e “La racchietta e la bestia”.

Io sto sempre a sentire il mio prossimo.

E’ questo il motivo principale del 99% dei miei guai.

Ma questo ve lo racconto un’altra volta, per oggi godetevi le mie performance canore 😀

Advertisements

Life is a journey, not a destination (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Italians do it better: there is no other people in the world (but the esquimeses, yes, you are fucky right) that are so prone to give and seek, sure, directions, driving directions, as Italians are.

Intriguing part of the story, there are lots of different styles in giving and seeking directions, mainly linked to the origin of the direction-giver/seeker.

Here it is a Milanese giving-style you can likely experience:

“I do not know, sorry”.

9 out of 10 people in Milan will never be able to give you ANY direction, and will never change the pace of their walk to give you an answer.

Neapolitan folks, on another hand, will stop any activity they were doing before you asked them a direction, will never give up and will always give you a direction, even the wrong or completely useless one:

“Yeah, follow this route, ok? about…around…boh, walk 30 minutes and then ask again…”.

“Not the first one, not the second one, not the third one, but at fourth traffic light turn right, not the first, not the second, but take the third street on the left, then the second on the right…or, no, no, wait, its first the third street on the right, then the fourth on the left…then ask someone else, you sould be close…”

“Compa’, follow my car, I am going near there”.

Wait…I do not  know but my mother for sure does….HEEEY [screaming upward at the 4th floor where his mum lives] MAAAAA’, MAAAAA’, WHERE THE SUCKY FUCK ARE YOU? COME HERE….AND BRING TWO COFFEES, MOVE ON”

Milanese seeking style is, as Milanese folks, practical, efficient, flat-out:

“Mr., I must go in Dante at no 19, at Notary’s office”.

They do not waste time in adding “street” or “course”, and they MUST go, and you understand that they MUST go for a clear reason (to meet a notary), and they MUST GO NOW!, in a flash, and you MUST give them direction ASAP.

Neapolitan again is a little bit different:

Excuse, excuse me boss (capo), boss, I should go in a place near the station this morning…“.

Neapolitan is not sure at all if he HAS really to go somewhere…he is ready to give up its intention at the first hurdle, the fist obstacle…he SHOULD go somewhere near the station, but he COULD also stop and have a coffee break, at the end of the day, life is a journey, not a destination.